1. The 12 boys that were lost in Thailand, we found after 10 days***They were getting so desperate to find these boys that at one point they considered deploying their secret “boy detector,” …Kevin Spacey

  2. The Martha’s Vineyard crowd strikes back at Alan Dershowitz for his supporting of the Trump campaign. Prominent lawyer says the locals have “shunned” him for supporting Donald Trump *****It must be bad in Martha’s Vineyard when the same guy who represented O.J Simpson is finally shunned due to his association with Trump

  3. FAA tells airline passengers “We’re a safety agency, not a creature comfort agency” ***This brings up a serious question: Is it a matter of safety or comfort when someone is dragged by their hair and screaming off a United Airlines flight?

  4. The FAA is telling passengers they are a safety agency, not a creature comfort agency. Especially when the creatures are all the dogs that have been dying inflight recently.

  5. Ten more Sears and Kmart stores have been added to the growing list of locations slated for closure as 78 now set to close this September ***I’m totally surprised! …to know that there are still at least 78 Sears stores still open.

  6. Air pollution linked to 3.2 million new diabetes cases in one year ***Mostly from people who have gotten obese from sitting on the couch all day because they don’t want to go out in the smog.

  7. Graeme McDowell had to withdraw from a British Open qualifier when Air France lost his clubs. **He could have played w/loner clubs, but instead Heathrows himself out of the event (Okay, seriously, this time I’m “throwing myself out.” I’ll use the backdoor, thank you…)

    • Graeme McDowell had to withdraw from a British Open qualifier when Air France lost his clubs. Graeme made a mistake when telling the baggage handler, “I make Birdies,” while handing over the clubs ***You know Airline rules: “Only one carrion per passenger”

  8. Two 4,500 year old homes were found near the Giza Pyramids in Egypt ***Apparently they were abandoned when the owners found out the neighborhood was being rezoned to allow high-rises

    • Two 4,500 year old homes were found near the Giza Pyramids in Egypt ***So, the houses were owned by a couple of “old Giza’s?? (Okay, I admit…BAD! I’ll show myself the way out the back…)

  9. Ahh. The 5th of July. When many nicknames are christened after silly white men drank much beer and handled explosives. Names like “Lefty” and “Patch.”

  10. In his resignation letter as head of the EPA, Scott Pruitt said that Trump is in the White House because of “God’s providence.” First time I ever heard “providence” defined as “biggest mistake ever.”

  11. A Facebook algorithm has found parts of the Declaration of Independence to be “racist.” **Which was no surprise considering it is a 242 year old document signed by 56 year old white men

  12. Republican members of Congress have one huge humanitarian question about Trump’s immigration policy: does it enhance or diminish their re- election campaign?

  13. Mets pitcher Jenrry Mejia reinstated from lifetime ban for failed PED tests ***After reviewing the lifetime ban, MLBs rules committee came to the conclusion that playing for the Mets was simply punishment enough!

  14. Republicans continue to sell themselves as defenders of the little guy with proposals to give tax breaks on mortgages for second and third homes, which are available to everyone, rich and poor alike.

  15. A new Australian law dictates that if you want to have sex you must ask for it clearly, and then hear a verbal “yes” back. Which must make it kinda’ embarrassing at the Sperm Bank.

  16. Nominee Brett Kavanaugh is also a Catholic meaning the prospective Supreme Court religious lineup will remain 6 Catholics and 3 Jews. Sounds like the dance card at a KKK lawn- burning jamboree.

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