Ding dong! That’s the doorbell. — 20 Comments

  1. To improve the odds that Trump will show up for the White House Easter Egg Roll, staffers are moving it to the first tee at Mar-a-Lago.

  2. Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Ben Carson was reportedly stuck in an elevator earlier today (Wed, April 12)…but, to be fair to the elevator, it fell asleep listening to him talk.

  3. Poll question of the day.
    Should Oscar Munoz, United CEO:
    a/ be fired
    b/ resign
    c/ be re-accommodated by being dragged out of his office kicking and screaming

  4. Another united customer has come forward saying he was threatened with handcuffs if he didn’t give up his seat for a more important passenger. Turns out he was sitting in 1B, the traditional seat for a pilots most import passenger. Jack Daniels.

  5. The Dallas Mavericks celebrated Fan Appreciation night by trotting out Tony Romo as an honorary Mav. Most fans didn’t recognize him without his clipboard.

  6. Trump isn’t just backing away from his campaign pledges, he’s running. Like a rat on fire down the ropes of a sinking oil tanker with a grenade strapped to his chest.

  7. U.S. drops what they call “the mother of all bombs” on ISIS hideout caves in Afghanistan. Trump is like, Now that’s Pussy Power.

  8. The U.S. dropped “The Mother Of All Bombs” on Afghanistan today and killed at least 20 people even though it didn’t explode, it squashed most of a crowd that was gathered at a goat wrestling contest, no word on the goat.
    This works out to less than $6 million per isis suspect killed, which is the best bargain in military spending so far in this, the 15th year of this war.

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