A lot of truth here. — 14 Comments

  1. How many presidential candidates does it take to change a light bulb? Apparently one more than we currently have.

  2. Those two NY prison escapees were planning to flee to Mexico after breaking out. Their getaway driver didn’t show up. Morgan Freeman wasn’t available?

  3. A 10 year old hunchbacked hound named Quasi Modo has won the 2015 Ugliest Dog in the World award. How ugly is it? Chefs at the Yulin Festival in China rejected it.

  4. “Magic Mike XXL,” the movie about a male stripper forced to come out of retirement. But don’t be led astray, XXL is his belt size.

  5. Fecal transplants have been used successfully to treat ulcerative colitis. Politicians make the best donors since they are full of sh*t.

  6. A Tennessee hardware store owner taped a “No Gays Allowed” sign to his storefront window. He could have at least let them use the rear entrance.

  7. Mitt Romney hosted a holiday sleepover Friday night with New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie and Florida Sen. Marco Rubio. Luckily Rubio got by on his wits, black coffee and the smell of 12 slices of bacon, 12 sausages, six eggs, four slices of bread and butter, four slices of toast, four slices of fried bread, two hash browns, an eight-egg cheese and potato omelette, fried potatoes, mushrooms, beans and tomatoes. ‘Cause that was Christie’s breakfast.

  8. New study reveals alcohol actually does make bad food smell better. In related news, Taco Bell will start selling alcohol in select locations.

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