JANICE HOUGH says:
A German man has posted a video after a breakup showing him sawing all their communal property in half with a power saw, including a teddy bear and a pickup truck. Wonder how many calls he’s gotten to option his story for a country song?
The annual race of the planets around the sun ended Tuesday, and as expected Jupiter and Venus ended up in a neck and neck tie. Also as expected Uranus could be found in its usual spot, which is of course in the rear.
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“The fireworks have gone out of our marriage,” my wife complained. Somehow the “Ooo and Ah” have morphed into “Boo and Blah.”
The federal government is suspending background checks. Now, what’s going to happen to all those people who depend on those checks every month?
According to the U.S. Census Bureau, white children will be a minority by 2020. Even worse, they’ll be living in the basement with THEIR parents.
Lego vow to replace plastic with environmentally friendly materials by 2030. Hope they consider charcoal. It’s cheap, and easy on the environment. Plus, it teaches kids black or white, getting dirty pisses mommy off.
McDonald’s says their quarter-pounder now weighs 1/4 ounce more. Not sure how they did this but, ”The Theory of Everything” Stephen Hawking has a spiffy new Ferrari-powered wheelchair.
Recently released emails show that Hillary Clinton didn’t know how to work the office fax machine. Said everyone under 30, “what’s a fax machine?”
The US beat Germany and is going to the Women’s World Cup final. Many Americans are so excited they might actually watch part of the game. #USAUSAUSA
A lot of guys watch anything that has the words Women and Cup in it.