HARTLEY MILLER says:
The San Francisco Giants have placed pitcher Matt Cain on the DL after he sliced his finger while trying to cut a sandwich. When he returns to the lineup Cain plans on using his forkball.
Always Funny
Topical humor from the world's best humorists
Burger King has decided to retire its slogan “Have it your way.” The slogan however has been picked by the Obama administration to describe its policy toward Russia.
Kicking off the comedy: “I’m feeling a Fairy Tale atmosphere in here…like I am surrounded by witches and trolls.”
The CIA says it will no longer use vaccination centers in spy operations. We should also stop referring to our soldiers as storm troopers.
The New England Patriots have introduced a jersey “guarantee” whereas if the player leaves, you can trade in the jersey. Be sure to read the fine print, it says you get a Wes Welker one in exchange.
A spokesperson for The New York Jets said they will not copy the policy as they wouldn’t know what to do with a million Sanchez jerseys.
Prince Charles and Camilla have arrived in Winnipeg for the final leg of their Canadian tour. For the record, Camilla is NOT wearing a nasal strip.
All of those jokes that ask:
“Hey Camilla, why the long face”
will start in …..5 …..4 …..3 …..
lol
Funny, TC!
Thanks Gary, you are so kind. Bachman TC Overdrive Forever. haha
77 year old Mary Tyler Moore’s eyesight is failing her. She has been fighting Type 1 Diabetes. The good news is that Ms. Moore is not tripping over the ottoman daily.
Johnny Weir has been accused of attacking his husband Victor, scratching him with his nails. “If you really want to hurt him, hit him with your purse”, suggested Beyonce’s sister Solange.
TC, very good one about the nasal strip. I applaud you.
Thx Bill. Your Bugger, I mean Burger King slogan is a killer. lol
You can now text 911. Not a good idea for girls who stutter though … Texting “91” gets you Bill Clinton’s private iPhone.
Due to one player on the Los Angeles’ Dodgers Triple-A affiliate partially chewing off the ear of a teammate, the Dodgers clubhouse has now outlawed the phrase “Bite me.”
‘Price Is Right’ viewers complained about President Obama interrupting show with speech about Veteran Affairs scandal. Next he should interrupt ‘Wheel of Fortune’ with a speech about global warming.
I yearn for the good ol days when locking up a professional athlete meant signing him to a long-term contract.
Burger King has decided to retire its slogan “Have it your way.” The slogan however has been picked up by the Obama administration to describe its policy toward Russia.