I’ll have the old-fashioned. — 4 Comments

  1. An actor best-known for playing a Klingon in “Star Trek: Deep Space Nine,” was elected to a town board in Ulysses, New York. He received 60% of the women’s vote, 70% of the Hispanic vote, and 100% of the vote of single men who live in their mother’s basement.

  2. Off the coast of Africa, CDs of Brittany Spears are being played to keep Somali pirates away. Stay tuned, the pirates are expected to retaliate this week with recordings by William Hung.

  3. Houston Texans Head Coach Gary Kubiak had a medical issue at half time last Sunday. Good thing that analyst John Madden has retired. Can you imagine him on his Telestrator, “BAM, here’s where he drops near the 15, and BOOM – right away the medics are there.”

  4. Justin Bieber was seen going into a Brazilian brothel. There was a bit of a language barrier … He said he was into Rap, so they tied him to a post.

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