Gold standard, indeed. — 8 Comments

  1. Disney has a live-action version of Cinderella in the works. Nice to know the Creative Mouse-Ear Powers have an endless well to draw from. What’s next…Dumbo?

  2. A 16-year-old Florida girl was arrested and expelled from her high school after a science project resulted in an explosion. Apparently, she was trying to illustrate the “Big Bang Theory.”

  3. Chicago is spending five hundred million dollars to fix up Wrigley Field, and a lot of people say that money should be spent on the homeless … Well, to that I say, the Cubs partly qualify. They’re homerun-less.

  4. Maria Shriver is returning to NBC as a “Special Anchor” after a 10 year absence. However, no one remembers when Governor Ahnold’s ex left the network, that she said, “I’ll be BOK!”.

  5. A small group of protesters want the NFL to change the name of the Washington Redskins. The league is considering “The District of Columbia Redskins” to appease descendents of the first President.

  6. Jason Collins, the NBA player who announced he was gay will likely get into the Hall of Fame as he was the 1st pro ahtlete to come forth. “Why didn’t I think of that?”, said Pete Rose.

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