That’s a big target. — 26 Comments

  1. Los Angeles just retired a 94-year-old teacher. That’s old. That’s so old she remembers when Cher was her name, not what she does with body parts … She remembers when Botox was what your son Bo does at 14 months … She remembers when Fatty Arbuckle was just plump.
    (Thanks to Gary Bachman for the idea)

  2. A class action suit has been filed against Amheuser Busch, the makers of Budweiser for watering down their beer. No surprise here. Canadians have called their products “Making Love by the Lakeshore” ever since I can remember.

  3. The Europeans aren’t the only ones discovering that their food isn’t what they think it is. A friend of mine was disappointed to find meat inside his pot pie.

  4. To start off National Colon Cancer Awareness Month a giant inflatable colon was launched in Times Square … It’s very life-like, right down to that roadkill Trump wears on his head.

  5. I had a dream that I was in bed with a tarantula…turns out my wife was trying to strangle me with her hair extension.

    • I had a dream that I was eating a fish taco. When I woke up my wife had a strange smile on her face and she has been singing all morning. Coincidence?

  6. A Scottish cardinal apologized for committing “unspecified” sexual acts … Now usually “unspecified” means not specific. However in this case it means not with girls.

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