A 34-year-old Ohio man set a Guinness World Record fist pumping for 17 hours straight. He wouldn’t disclose his training regime but this reporter found out it involves a monkey and lots of spanking. – Bill Williams

A French swimmer with no arms or legs plans to swim around the world … Could be worse. If he were Italian, he couldn’t talk either. – Bill Williams

An Australian billionaire is building an exact copy of the Titanic … Well not an exact copy. This one sinks counterclockwise. – Bill Williams

Hanoi Jane Fonda is going to play Nancy Reagan in a new movie … This is the biggest insult to a national icon since, I don’t know, that Texan played the president of the United States. – Bill Williams