1. If I won the lottery first thing I’d do is open a burger joint and only only serve people with no shoes and no shirt.

  2. Dopey Donald has a new legal strategy. He can’t obstruct justice because he’s president. Can’t wait for him to test his infallibility by trying to obstruct traffic as well.

  3. One bad thing about being married to a vampire at this time of year, is that I know what’s coming: The Bite Before Christmas.

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