1. Los Angeles is likely to host the 2024 or 2028 Summer Olympics. By that time, Trump’s border wall should be built and Mexico will be favored to win gold in the pole vault.

  2. When it comes to cars, a “stripper” means a zero-options crate lacking all the extras. When it comes to women, a stripper is something very cool, with all the options.

  3. LPGA rookie player S. Santiwiwatthanaphong of Thailand, who finished 11th in last week’s tournament was almost assessed a 2 stroke penalty for taking too long to sign her scorecard. Not only that, but she also managed to crash the “Spellcheck” app on the LPGA computers.

  4. I’ve always liked the skin-tight outfit that Cat Woman wears, but I just can’t warm up to Bat Girl. I mean, when she’s middle-aged, who wants to be married to an old bat?

  5. Kid Rock announced he’s running for the U.S. Senate in 2018. The Kid doesn’t have much recognition outside the music industry though. *Ed O’Neil thinks he’s bald under that hat.

  6. Trump Senior says he had no talks with Russia about this election. Trump Junior says we had talks with Russian lawyers to find out how best to beat Hillary, Reminds me of Art Linkletter’s motto: Kid’s Say the Darndest Things.

  7. Memphis woman is planning to file a complaint with the state medical board after her doctor called her “Aunt Jemima.” Well, at least he didn’t say she was stacked.

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