1. So Michael Vick will be inducted into Virginia Tech’s sports hall of fame nearly 20 years after his playing days were over at the school. Getting him in must’ve been a real dogfight.

  2. Trump is 12. And not a “lived in the woods and shot and skinned his own food” 12. More of a “rich spoiled brat who fired his driver for laughing at his haircut” 12.

  3. Former President Obama is back in town speaking at a Democratic fundraiser. Not much has changed since he left, except the White House is now so transparent the first lady has started wearing lead bra and panties.

  4. A campaign committee has filed with the Federal Election Commission to draft Baywatch star Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson for president. This may not be pleasant news for many people … Because come 2020 they plan to toss his Speedo into the ring.

  5. I’m trying to kickstart my celebrity status with a unique, signature “look” ala Michael Jackson. Next week I plan to start wearing just one sparkly sock.

  6. First- no collusion. Nobody colluded. Then, just a little collusion. Now it turns out, collusion- not such a bad thing. Everybody does it. Next, collusion will be mandatory.

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