1. The GOP defense is that Trump is new at this sort of thing & doesn’t know what he’s doing. He isn’t housebroken. Still got his training wheels on. Only had a couple of at bats at Presidential Spring Training.

  2. North Korea allows citizens only one smartphone and it can only download apps approved by the Kim Jong Un regime. But at least the battery will never blow up. It’s powered by a potato and two nails.

  3. My memory loss works in my wife’s favor these days. “Sex? Babe, we just had it last night!” Um…OK then.

  4. A psychology professor at the Lancaster University in England says a fetus can distinguish between face-like and non-face-like shapes. Don’t ask how they determined this because it’s very complicated. All I know is it involved an adult toy and a bag of Doritos.

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