Better than cleaning up after Conway or Spicer. — 16 Comments

  1. 1984
    1, number of people who like him.
    9, number of people who voted for him.
    8, number who wish they hadn’t.
    4, number of months he’ll be in office.
    Who is it?

  2. The U.S. Patent Office granted Amazon a patent allowing them to drop packages from drones into back yards via parachute. Perfect for next Valentine’s Day. I got you a beautiful diamond necklace honey, but it landed in Jack’s backyard and he gave it to Jill.

  3. Monday is International Pipe Smoking Day. Pipe smokers will celebrate in one of two ways. Sucking in a lung full of the finest Virginia Flake from their best Irish pipe. Or lying there quietly while the widow puts flowers on their grave.

  4. WWE wrestling star George ‘The Animal ‘ Steele died at 79 … In high school George had the choice of politics or wrestling. He chose wrestling because if you grabbed your opponent’s crotch no one yelled at you.

  5. A marijuana farm was discovered inside a building on land owned by the Legoland theme park in England. Word has it that the CEO and Board of Directors meet there after suffereing the slings and arrows of outrageous profits.

    • Good point Gary. “REAL DONALD T NEWS” reports that there were no major casualties at Bowling Green, however 15 trays of ‘Swedish Meat Balls’ were absolutely destroyed by terrorists at Stockholm’s airport catering services building.

      Donald will be expected to be tweeting around 3 am today about the bad/sad security surrounding Sweden’s catering industry.

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