JERRY W says:
I carry my retirement policy in my wallet, it’s a Lotto ticket that I haven’t checked yet making it a Schrödinger’s Lotto ticket. It’s been also a ticket for me to get better treatment everywhere I go, so be nice to me, I could be a millionaire. Or not.
Stanford scientists have been able to partially restore vision to blind mice. And there’s even more good news for the three blind mice. Gloria Allred sued the farmer’s wife for cutting off their tails with a carving knife and got a settlement of $3.2 million.
I mentioned before that my Samsung phone has a setting in preferences for watching porno videos they call “One handed operation”. What I recently discovered was that in that same settings window you can switch the operative hand and then it’s just like having a different phone.
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Some guys in Missouri have been charged with using the Pokemon Go game to lure people to secluded places and rob them. Nobody told them that if you try that, you’ll wind up in the pokey, mon.
You mean “Pokemon” isn’t a Hatian gay Web site? I guess I read too much into that name.
Give her an inch…and she’ll probably be unsatisfied by a mile.
My heart’s okay. It’s my wallet that needs a pacemaker.
A pop-up ice cream museum will open in New York’s Meatpacking District next month. Besides ice cream tasting they have an ice cream paring service. You know, what sweet treat goes best with your personality. For instance, if you were a Kardashian girl, it would be chocolate with nuts.
In Florida a woman was taken to the hospital for evaluation after she drove into a house and told police she was praying with her eyes closed. This is not I think what Carrie Underwood meant with ”Jesus take the wheel.”
I used to work in advertising. Who could forget: “When it rains, it does.”
Actually rooting for Trump/ Gingrich because then we can call it, “The Six Wives Club Ticket.”
In Nashville, a man had his face covered with toilet paper while he robbed a store. Witnesses said he appeared a little flushed.
Bernie Sanders officially endorsed Hillary for president. But the 74-year-old may have stayed in the campaign just a little too long. He told supporters to vote for his opponent, Hillary E. Dewey.