WILL the THRILL says:
Zoo officials in Ohio were forced to shoot a silverback gorilla after a child found his way into the enclosure. Moral of the story: Animals must not monkey around with humans.
Always Funny
Topical humor from the world's best humorists
We all know about Google’s self-driving car, but have your heard about the American Bar Association’s self-driving ambulance? It can pickup you up at the accident, take you to court, then bring you home. All for the low, low price of everything you’ve got.
Last Friday was National Donut Day. They had it on Friday because Saturday was National Set Your Bathroom Scale Back Day.
It’s amazing what you can see at the beach these days. Somehow it just seems thong…
Dopey Donald says Mexican and Muslim judges can’t be impartial. He only wants blonde bloviating bullies adjudicating his cases.
Lebron James says NBAFinals game 3 is a “must-win.” Well, only if the Cavs don’t want their summer vacation to start this weekend.
Vin Scully was telling DDay stories on June 6 during the Dodgers’ loss. Wonder if the stories included watching Jamie Moyer pitch that day?
Saw a television ad saying to go to Hooters for the food. Aimed at the same people who used to say they read Playboy for the articles?
A California high school boy brought his favorite video game
”Super Smash Bros. Melee” as his prom date. After the dance he tried to get frisky with The Legend of Zelda but was quickly squelched when she whacked his mouse with a ruler.
Authorities in Central Florida are trying to identify a man who was found dead inside an alligator’s mouth. Their only clue so far is that he was wearing alligator shoes. They think it was a murder-suicide pact gone wrong.
Great news! I finally found my ultimate Dream Boat. Unfortunately she isn’t for sail.
Bernie Sanders says he still has a chance and plans to fight on. He’s also picking the Oklahoma City Thunder in the NBA Playoffs.
The National Enquirer says Richard Simmons has transitioned into a woman and is called “Fiona.” And Fiona ain’t Sweatin’ to the Oldies anymore, ‘cause Fiona’s now a 44DD.
#BristolPalin has married her baby daddy. And millions of Americans are asking “Which one?”