Gary cracks us up! — 15 Comments

  1. Anyone who thought the GOP campaign couldn’t go any lower? I think this CNN headline might mean we just hit bottom.”Donald Trump defends size of his penis.”

  2. Los Angeles to open ‘Museum of Broken Relationships.’ Exhibit A will be a tape of last night’s Republican debate.

  3. Knowing that this is probably her last shot (no Vince Foster pun intended) at a chance to be the president of actual Americans and not just corporations, Hillary has taken the big leap and changed her name to Bernice Sanders. The question: after getting beaten by a younger black guy last time will she now be able to defeat an older Jewish guy? The answer: Why should this election be any different than any others?

  4. A bloody knife was dug up at O.J. Simpson’e old Brentwood estate. When contacted the Juice said he’s got a whole new plan for when he gets out of the slammer. This time he’s going to every Overeaters Anonymous meeting in the country till he finds the real killer. Oh, and he’s for Trump.

  5. China is working on their first supercar. A four-wheel-drive, 1000 horsepower behemoth that goes zero-to-60 in 2.5 seconds and a top speed well in excess of 200 mph. For this monster they needed a very brave test driver, and the’ve got him. Lance Wangstrong, The Great Ball of China.

  6. A buried knife was found on OJ Simpson’s former estate and the LAPD are currently testing it. OJ says that any blood found on the knife was due him cutting himself while showing an LA Dodger how to slice an avocado.

  7. The world is running low on old single malt scotch whiskey. Great–just when Donald Trump may become President.

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