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Happy Halloween! — 8 Comments

  1. The Pentagon sent fighter jets to intercept what appeared to be an unmanned surveillance blimp drifting over Pennsylvania. Either that, or Kirstie Alley fell off the diet wagon again.

  2. Barack Obama welcomed trick-or-treaters at the White House. He took candy from the bags of the rich kids and distributed it to the poor kids.

  3. Tuesday is local election day and we’ll finally be rid of all those nasty ads the local politicians have been running. They’ll be replaced on Wednesday by all the nasty ads the national politicians will be running.

  4. Citizens of Washington, Oregon and Colorado didn’t want to perpetuate a bad habit this Halloween by giving out candy. So they passed out Zig Zag papers instead.

  5. Everybody thought Kim Kardashian’s Halloween costume was Kim Kardashian. But they were wrong, mainly because Kim K. got it wrong. She went as Donald Trump, but thought “bluster” was what you put your boobs in.

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