Gagne with a spoon! — 15 Comments

  1. A Florida man ‘surfed’ atop a stranger’s moving car while high on meth. He’s lucky he didn’t wipe out.

  2. Florida man is suing a hospital for throwing his amputated leg in garbage. Hospital says he doesn’t have a leg to stand on.

  3. Alpine skier Lindsey Vonn announced breakup with boyfriend Tiger Woods. Apparently, their relationship went downhill.

  4. New royal baby girl born to Kate and William. Congratulations. And taking a rare day off from the spotlight, Bruce Jenner was not the midwife.

  5. Rod Stewart’s Lamborghini is for sale. $1.9 million. And it gets worse. The gas mileage is terrible. 12 panties per gallon.

  6. How is Congress like a same-sex couple? Both are screwing around all the time but never producing anything.

  7. I have the silver mid-life crisis Mercedes sports car, but chicks say I’m still just an Old Sport.

  8. New York customs officers found pound of cocaine in crotch of man’s underwear. Officers were immediately suspicious of an Asian man who appeared well-hung. 

  9. Due to ongoing rioting and security concerns in Baltimore, the Orioles and White Sox did not admit any fans to their game last Wed. NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell can’t believe they didn’t move this game to London, England.

  10. There are about 200 urbanized coyotes living in the Vancouver BC area. Animal welfare societies warn people not to interact with or feed them. Cougars on the other hand can be bought 2 drinks maximum, before they become dangerous.

  11. New York customs officers found pound of cocaine in crotch of man’s underwear. The coke was found in his Toot of the Looms.

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