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Screech! — 10 Comments

  1. Got a Google self-driving car for Christmas. It has some bugs though. I typed in my destination, Denver, and it went, “Up in Smoke.”

  2. I finally get it! When Neil Armstrong said, “That’s one small step for mankind,” he was talking about “The Interview.”

  3. I met this Arabic girl who was so lovely. We smoked some vanilla tobacco at a trendy spot, and went back to her apartment. I was so high on nicotine that I couldn’t unhookah her bra.

  4. Yesterday marked the 10 year anniversary of the Asian tsunami. Fans at the Quick Lane Bowl game observed the anniversary by doing the wave.

  5. A Florida man caused a hospital fire by smoking crack while hooked to oxygen. Luckily, the fire was extinguished with the contents of his bedpan.

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