WILL the THRILL says:
Perfume is an odd gift to give for Christmas. It’s like saying: here take this, because you don’t smell very good.
Always Funny
Topical humor from the world's best humorists
WILL the THRILL says:
Perfume is an odd gift to give for Christmas. It’s like saying: here take this, because you don’t smell very good.
Pre-1965 US quarters have a “melt-value” for their 90% silver…that’s like saying: “Hey, old dudes, I might be able to get you $4.00 for your spleen and left kidney.”
100 brains are missing from the University of Texas. Does this even need a punchline?
I’m guessing that they saved some time in their search by skipping the governors mansion and the homes of their senators and congress members.
Is Igor a suspect? Were they all labeled “Abby Normal”?
In England, George Clooney made an appearance on Downton Abbey for charity. Women get it. For men, this is the equivalent of NFL football with naked cheerleaders.
Lady Gaga shocked her fans by saying she was raped by an older man when she was 19. Her fans were really shocked, when Bill Cosby’s name wasn’t mentioned.
Blonde hair attracts men. I think it’s because the color reminds them of beer.
The city of Burien, Washington, has made offensive body odor illegal.
No coincidence that Burien is right next door to R. M. Pitt, Washington.
New Hampshire Police airplane clocked a 19-year-old male driving 127 MPH. Told the cops he just washed the Vette and couldn’t do a thing with it.
Living in France, I saw my share of striped-shirt wearing drunks with pasty faces, wearing berets. God, it’s so true that a Mime is a terrible thing to waste…
The Secret Service must be doing a lousy job. I mean, if they’re secret, how come we know about them?
NICE ONE! And not even the deodorant they use is a…Secret.
If my wife insists that we “draw names” again for her freaky side of the family this Christmas, I may lose my mind and draw blood.
At least this time around, when it comes to sending troops overseas, President Obama has an exit strategy. It’s called “being termed out.”