Will he accept the charges? — 16 Comments

  1. The University of Virginia says homework can make you sick … In 1999 my brother ate my homework. Now he sleeps in front of the heater and sniffs butts.

  2. Breakfast war between Macdonalds and Taco Bell continues with a Macdonalds tweet showing a chihuahua and the caption “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.” They are also offering free coffee. Of course Taco Bell will respond with a chihuahua stating “I wouldn’t drink their coffee even if it was free”.

  3. Tiger has withdrew from this year’s Masters tournament after undergoing back surgery. Insiders say the damage done to his back appears to be from a 9-iron a few years ago.

  4. OK, my feelings are officially hurt. The poster for my comedy show in Ann Arbor this weekend was defaced by someone who wrote: ***Vomit Alert*** Hey, I deserve more than six stars, dude.

  5. I used to have feelings for my cute, Blonde, female dentist, that is, until she numbed me up.

    My cable-provider is offering a “free” Watchathon week. And still we can’t find nothon woth watchon.

  6. “Be careful where you shoot that stuff!” the redhead cried to her lover. “I do not want another case of “Swimmer’s Ear.”

  7. A Virginia Tech professor has discovered a way to make food out of wood chips … Not only is it nutritional, the leftovers can be turned into a sturdy workbench.

  8. Michael Jackson is releasing a new album in May … It won’t be easy to find, you’ll have to dig for it.

    He’s backed by all the best contemporary artists, the only other dead guy on it is Keith Richards.

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