Seattle area veterinarians said the legalization of recreational marijuana has led to a rise in canine pot ingestion. It has also led to a rise in milkbone ingestion.
Mark Zuckerberg apparently has called President Obama to complain about the U.S. government’s surveillance program. Guess he believes collecting personal data on Americans should be left to the private sector.
Regarding that billion dollar prize for picking the winners of every March Madness game, the odds of getting it right are apparently 1 in 9 quintillion. Yes, curiously enough the same odds of the Cubs winning the World Series.
Vanna White is not feeling well–she has irritable vowel syndrome.
Seattle area veterinarians said the legalization of recreational marijuana has led to a rise in canine pot ingestion. It has also led to a rise in milkbone ingestion.
Kendall Jenner took to Instagram to share a picture of herself in Calvin Klein underwear–which she borrowed from her father.
Bruce Jenner has breasts. Now that takes balls … No, real balls, they used his to make them.
My wife bought a juicer. She loves it. The woman has a real talent for sucking the life out of things.
Whoever is supposed to bring me luck always seems to be coming by horse and buggy.
I noticed my bank teller’s name plate was Shannon O. Wong, so I asked her where in Ireland was she from. She said County Yourchange.
When my bank teller wife and I went away for a romantic weekend, she was actually hoping for a “stick-up” in the bedroom.
Mark Zuckerberg apparently has called President Obama to complain about the U.S. government’s surveillance program. Guess he believes collecting personal data on Americans should be left to the private sector.
Regarding that billion dollar prize for picking the winners of every March Madness game, the odds of getting it right are apparently 1 in 9 quintillion. Yes, curiously enough the same odds of the Cubs winning the World Series.
The audience at my comedy gig last night must have included quite a few movie buffs. That would explain them tossing plenty of Rotten Tomatoes my way.
Will, do you ever use some of our stuff in your act?
All the time, which is why they call me The Man of Steal!
Quiznos sandwich chain has filed for bankruptcy protection. They’re registered trademark is “MMMM….Toasty” They should probably drop the letter “y”.
OK! That’s where I get them.
Saudi Arabia has issued a list of 50 names banned for cultural or religious reasons. I had no idea there were that many Kardashians.