The world’s first known human cannibals ate each other to satisfy their nutritional needs. Fossil evidence indicated they preferred eating the human lower leg by making below-knee sandwiches. – George Emil

A one-legged man in Florida escaped from police on foot. Literally, on foot. – Alex Schubert

Glen Campbell has Alzheimers? I guess that levels the playing field, since the rest of the country has already forgotten who he is. Or was. – Jerry W

What’s next for New York after their historic gay marriage vote? A Billy Crystal movie sequel titled ‘When Harry met Sal?” – Janice Hough